#3 Deep Freeze equals Major Meltdown

Things started moving fast. It was almost too fast. Before we knew it, it was being thrown around at an Executive's Brunch for Trav's colleagues that Travis was jetting off to the Bahamas. It was crazy and a bit scary. We certainly didn't want to be locked into something just for exploring its possibilities. Further complicating matters, since Travis's work viewed this as a transfer, discussions that addressed anything monetary-related were kept on the back-burner. We kept proceeding through each step of the process thinking there would be something tangible to run with and we were not on the receiving end of valuable information.

Travis spoke to the GM of the new hotel and learned the background of the project and the time-frame. We learned that this position needed to relocate by May. We knew we would need to break our lease and would have limited time to tie up loose ends. Travis asked about housing and was advised that she lived in a great community with a lot of expatriate families and that there were a few housing developments to choose from that were all close to work. Their informative conversation was followed quickly with follow up conversations with others from the new Bahamas hotel. Each shared a piece of their experience relocating to the Bahamas and wanted to hear all about Trav. As the potential slowly materialized, we started to see this as a viable opportunity and we started to get excited. We started to tell our friends and family the crazy opportunity we were considering. We vowed to keep a level head throughout the process and make a decision that made the most sense. After sharing our experience, we heard of others that had taken on the same adventure and highly recommended it. It was proposed that the Bahamas, being tax-free, would be the perfect start we needed to save money to start our lives and family. The housing allowance would allow us to save a lot of money. Let's be honest, there's not many places that are more expensive then New York so all the talk of higher costs for gas, groceries, and duty tax mean little to us.

The phone conversations progressed to face-to-face conversations, when Trav met with a Bahamas HR team member in New York. It was explained that things would stall through the Holidays, so not to worry if the process didn't take up steam again until January (It was November). We felt like we were chasing our tails a bit but the Holidays seemed to be the right thing to take our mind off of everything for awhile.

We wanted to start planning just in case this came to fruition but with no talk of relocation finances that was impossible. We were just waiting. And then the cold set in.

Of course this is the year that we are suffering from record cold temperatures and snow levels. It has been unbearable. I have learned things this winter that no Cali girl should ever have to know. Our pipes have frozen and busted, I've shoveled more snow then an Eskimo, and I've set off a fire alarm with steam from the shower, just trying to defrost. Get me the fuck out of here (sorry, I'm having flash backs). We've lived through the Blizzard of 2010 and now this! I am officially done. Just like the cold finding its way into my bones, the panic started to seep into my subconscious. Prior to the Bahamas, Trav and I were having healthy discussions about leaving New York and were open to exploring new options. Then, the Bahamas trounced through in her bikini, stole all of our attention, and we had not come up with a Plan B. We had promised our loved ones we were going to be smart about this, and we were not being smart.

The Holidays came and went, and in mid January a new player had entered the playing field. We won't confuse things with titles and explanations but we'll call her Shellie and she's high up on the food chain in the Food & Beverage sector of Trav's hotel group. She asked Trav for a meeting because she had an exciting update. "Exciting" is always good. We were hopeful this would be the conversation that would start everything in motion again and rescue us from this awful purgatory. Shellie told Travis that the reason his progression had previously been held up these past few months, was because of a formality in the contract between Trav's hotel group in the Bahamas and the complex developer, which we'll call BHD  (Bahamas Hotel Developer, creative, I know). Basically, the governing property, BHD has a commitment to the Bahamian Government to provide a certain number of local jobs. With that said, they naturally need to limit the number of jobs that are given to expatriates throughout all of the hotels on property. And to add a political spin, the less expats the other hotels hire, the more ex-pats the BHD team is allowed to hire for their own hotel property that is also located on the complex grounds. Do you smell the contradiction I'm cooking? Good.

The formality that Shellie was referencing was the requirement of potential expatriate candidates of all hotels on property to meet the BHD team for approval, prior to being hired. If you see this as a bit counter-productive to meet with a team that has a vested interest in you NOT getting the job, you catch on fast. Hence the "hold up" as Trav's hotel searched another route. But Shellie was there to save the day because they found a loop hole in the contract that would negate this requirement, therefore, we were good to go with the next step. Travis left the meeting looking forward to hearing from her within the week to schedule the much needed trip to the Bahamas to finally get the answers we've been waiting for!

And then one of life's sharp turns. Shellie advised a couple of weeks later that they had the contract reviewed by another source and they were, in fact, mistaken. They were not able to get around meeting with the BHD team and this would further delay the process as BHD had little incentive to speed this along. This door was closing. I was bummed and confused. The longer this process took, the less time Trav and I would have to put an entire move together and that made the opportunity increasingly stressful and therefore, unappealing.  I could not wrap my head around the reasoning behind all of this in the first place. Why had this opportunity been dropped on our door step just to lead us down a rabbit hole for several months? It didn't make sense.

I was done. I was tired, and cold, and I needed to get out of New York. I started to feel trapped, I started to feel helpless. Weeks went by and soon it had been another month without hearing anything. I was doing my best to keep everything in stride but driving in the snow, and shoveling the snow, day-after-day with no end in sight was starting to eat at my sanity. I didn't realize it at the time but as my disdain for the city and winter grew, my dependance on a scape goat grew even more. And when an innocent night at Taco Tuesday ended with me crying in my closet (a major downgrade from crying in the shower), I knew I had officially hit rock bottom.

I called my best friend the next morning for advice. I had gotten so turned around in my head, I didn't know what I wanted any more. She helped me realize that Trav and I needed a new plan. We didn't have a Plan B. It was time to focus on Plan B

Read Next: #4- The Dark Ages, Mar 03

#2 Will Work For Shells...

I guess I could be called somewhat of a free spirit and admittedly it's hard for me to stay in one place though I haven't always been this way. I was perfectly content after living in San Diego for 20 years, yet, when the opportunity to live in Manhattan dropped in my lap, I didn't hesitate. In six short weeks, I was gone. Again, I believe in signs and when one door opens that widely, it's hard not to run straight through it.

I knew the day I stepped foot onto the island of Manhattan in 2008 that I belonged here. A subsequent series of opening and closing of doors then led me through the best years of my life: opening my own business and meeting my husband. Trav and I had such exciting times in Hoboken, yet, when Hurricane Irene took our apartment, I knew it was a sign that it was time to move on. The yellow brick road then led our lost souls straight to the quaint beach town of Long Beach, New York and we knew instantly that we had found our new home. Our hearts beat strong here for a couple of years and then a few harsh winters put a freeze on our summer-lovin. The feelings of belonging had slowly faded and I began to feel like I was watching the facade of New York crumble away and what was being revealed was its underbelly, and it was wearing on me. I was praying for a sign. I was praying for an open door that would lead us out of New York.

The sign came while I was in the shower, of all places. Trav called, as he does every night as he was walking to the train. I asked him how his day was and he then asked how my day was, even though every day is exactly the same. It's the married couples' dance that occurs in households across America between 6 and 8p. But tonight, our normal changed. He mentioned that the VP of Operations had randomly reached out to him to offer him the possibility of becoming the new Food & Beverage Director of their new property in the Bahamas. We were both vaguely familiar with the project.

Rewind.

We were sitting at a table in Kauai, while on our honeymoon, waiting for the Luau to begin, when a colorful southern couple, *Janet and *Roger, joined our table. Janet was the type that lit up a room by smiling from ear-to-ear. Roger smiled from ear-to-ear too, but more in an endearing, silly way, or like he had just raided the mini bar when no one was looking. They then became that couple that seems to have your exact daily itinerary at the resort. We constantly bumped into them and wound up chatting for long periods of time. Oddly enough, they kept a boat in the Bahamas full-time and made frequent trips. I listened to their island escapades with such envy! It sounded like the life you only dream about! In other words, the life that other people live. Roger owned car dealerships across the US and a younger looking Janet, called him "Daddy" and not the "related" kind. They mentioned that they had just been invited guests to a star-studded ground breaking event for a new conglomerate of hotels that's revolutionizing the Carribean. They looked at models and plans for the project and said it was going to be amazing. They couldn't stop talking about how incredible the property was. Travis and I knew the hotel group he currently worked for was working on a high-profile project in the Bahamas and remarked on the coincidence. I now have a feeling that won't be the last time we toast Janet and Daddy poolside...
*names changed to protect the innocent (or possibly married) ...

Fast Forward

I hung up the phone with Travis and stood in the shower a little longer. The gravity of such an incredible opportunity falling in our laps enveloped me like hot steam. I had been praying for a way out and this seemed like a perfect answer, but I tried my best not to get overwhelmed with my emotions. I needed to think logically about such an undertaking so I took to Google.

That night, before Trav got home, I learned all about the Bahamas from a different perspective. I Googled "Dog Quarantine" in Nassau, which if present, would've killed the deal immediately. And each Google search led me to another new discovery and began to get me excited about a potential new chapter in our Salt Life.

When Travis got home that evening, we talked about everything we could think of. We couldn't find one solid red flag so we made the decision to take one step through the newly opened door. Maybe it really is, Better in the Bahamas...

Read Next #3- Deep Freeze equals Major Meltdown, Mar 01

#1- The Road To Hana

(This is where the whole story begins...)

I have always been a dreamer and a big believer in fate, destiny, and "signs from above". So when Trav and I fought on our honeymoon, I was devastated.

We spent 10 glorious days in Hawaii for our honeymoon last August. We had the most amazing time, except for one of those 10 days: the day we decided to tempt the Road to Hana.

This ridiculous, pot-hole ridden, one-lane road (leading unbeknownst travelers to a lackluster Hawaiian hideaway) has 620 curves. Need I say more? I will. These aren't typical "traverse your way through the country-side, while soaking in the local beauty" curves. These are "white-knuckle while you try to remember to breathe" curves. The roads are soaking wet, surrounded by sheer drop off cliffs and are full of honking local maniacs. On this particular soggy day in August, most of the road, the mountainside, and any directional signs had been washed away. Doing a K-turn in a Ford Focus was not an option so we wound up missing a good majority of the sights that our CD guide "Shaka Dave" promised us, "brahs", was a must-see!

The torturous turns that were beginning to turn my stomach would prove to be the easy part of our 12-hour journey. Turns out, there's also 46 ONE-lane bridges. These were especially fun because the overgrowth made us fully blind to what was on the other side. It was eternal eye shutting, teeth clenching, & praying for the best.

I powered through as long as I could and finally told Travis he had to pull over. I had enough and I was going to be sick. He happened to pull over where people were picnicking and I lost my urge. Yet, I was still sick and now I couldn't do anything to feel better - enter the moment the entire day culminated into a temper-tantrum. How had the day gone so terribly wrong?? Wasn't the honeymoon supposed to be the most magical 10 days of one's life? I was in major "victim" mode (duck face and all) as we drove back to the hotel in the dark, and in silence.

When we arrived to the hotel, as we were gathering our stuff out of the car, I had a " I lost my phone" panic stricken moment and literally lost my mind before realizing the "safe" compartment I had stored it in at the last place we had stopped. It was all too much. We got to the room, I got in the shower, and I cried. And then I threw up

The next morning, I was feeling like such a brat in my hotel bathrobe and fuzzy slippers, for ever having a "woe-is-me" moment on such an amazing trip. As I looked at the pictures from the previous day, it looked like we had spent the day on a road trip of a lifetime. We swam in caves with fresh water waterfalls, huddled under a towel on top of a geyser during an unexpected rain storm, ate lunch on a blanket with our feet in the black sand, and swam in the seven sacred pools. A few hundred curves, some come-to-jesus moments, and a good shower cry will never take those moments away. The dramatic interruptions of life, that seem gigantic in the moment, eventually fade. I've also learned that some of the best things are worth a little bit of fight. We now have a Road to Hana postcard on our fridge that makes us laugh.

I have to admit that my life journey has definitely resembled one long drive to Hana. For 34 years, my life has been a series of hairpin turns with unexpected destinations. I've continuously closed my eyes and hoped for the best on one too many one-lane bridges. And through the entire journey, there has been so many amazing "once-in-a-lifetime" moments that in the end, makes the entire experience worth the drive.

It's only fitting that our journey to the Bahamas would mimic the same arduous journey. The twists and turns have been tumultuous. I've been overcome with excitement for what's up ahead and I've been sick to my stomach on many occasions. Our new "normal" has become blind faith, signs from above, and of course, a little crying in the shower.

Read next: #2- Will Work for Shells, Feb 28